Hello!

On weekend mornings in the late 1980s in the San Francisco Bay Area, you could reliably find me and my younger brother playing Super Mario Brothers on our trusty Nintendo Entertainment System. Since I was 8 or 9, and Little Tony was 2 or 3, it goes without saying that I was destined to be the better player in our two-player matchups.

Unfortunately, it also goes without saying that that’s not telling the full story.

The FULL story is that foggy Berkeley mornings are cold and Pendleton blankets are not see-through and although my then-toddler-now-adult brother was HOLDING A CONTROLLER AND PRESSING IT WITHOUT CEASING, it was actually, always a one-player game.

I did a bad thing, Little Tony.*

{* Name as per my phone contacts.}

Dumpster Fires

For my 40th birthday this week my BFFs paid Nick Viall of The Bachelor to record a video congratulating me on my age via the personalized celebrity recording site, Cameo. Despite whatever sum my former “Otero” freshman dorm-mates paid him, Nick 100% failed to read the requisite one-sentence information blurb before hitting record on his message. To be clear, as talent for Cameo, this is, without a doubt, one’s ONLY job.

As a result, his birthday message to me is a glorious, emerging dumpster fire of a train-wreck. Watch as he literally… reads… the words… live … (and becomes increasingly confused in the process). I loved it dearly and let’s all pray to baby Jesus that Cameo continues not to fire him for ongoing poor performance.

Claire Díaz-Ortiz @Claire

For my 40th my BFFs sent me @BookCameo from @NickViall1 @BachelorABC.🤣 Nick has trouble pronouncing 'Buenos Aires' & is confused that @WIRED calls me The Woman who Got the Pope on @Twitter. NICK U R EVERY MAN! 🙏🏼 @amalia @LanaRaquel v.cameo.com/e/9SKnfMgUYmb

Nick Viall | CameoCheck out this Cameo by Nick Viall for Claire Diaz Ortiz!v.cameo.com

And, as if it wasn’t clear, he clarifies to what we can attribute his downward spiral:

Nick Viall @viallnicholas28

@Claire @BookCameo @NickViall1 @BachelorABC @WIRED @Twitter @amalia @LanaRaquel I panicked. Happy belated

Reading

Daley Ervin (a fellow venture capital Kauffman Fellow with me) is about to take off on the next leg of his goal to become the first American to circumnavigate the globe on human power.

What did you do this month? (I, for one, watched television.) I’ll be looking to wife Kat Cole (president of Athletic Greens) for the tweeting.

Daley Ervin @daleyervin

I'm 10 days away from my next big adventure -- continuing my life goal of becoming the first American to circumnavigate the globe on human power. I'll be rowing the Caribbean from Antigua to Miami (1,500 miles) with @gregmaud. With cooperative weather, it should take 20-28 days.

McSweeney’s wins the internet for a parody of a New-Covid-Rules-for-School Email for Parents. A taste:

“We recognize that at-home tests no longer exist except for 5 seconds on Walmart’s website before vanishing. As such, our school nurse has approved the use of a Q-tip with six droplets of vodka splashed onto an egg carton instead.”

Read it.

Dmitri Alperovitch @DAlperovitch

In the last few weeks, I have become increasingly convinced that Kremlin has unfortunately made a decision to invade Ukraine later this winter. While it is still possible for Putin to deescalate, I believe the likelihood is now quite low. Allow me to explain why 🧵

Yes.

Adam Grant @AdamMGrant

A mark of an open mind is being more committed to your curiosity than to your convictions. The goal of learning is not to shield old views against new facts. It's to revise old views to incorporate new facts. Ideas are possibilities to explore, not certainties to defend.

Startups, etc.

Oh hey look what fund is now doing early stage checks into Latin American startups? It’s Kleiner Perkins and yours truly, with a map to make you ponder every thought you ever thought about THE AMERICAS.

Claire Díaz-Ortiz @Claire

Guess what top fund is now doing early checks in Latin America?!! Congrats @kleinerperkins for READING THE GLOBAL ROOM & @Claire (Scout/self), for an upcoming bounty of LatAm plenty. DMs open, per always. 🙏🏼🇦🇷🇧🇷🇲🇽🇨🇴🇵🇷🇸🇻🇨🇷🇭🇳🇵🇦🇨🇱🇵🇪🇪🇨🇺🇾🇻🇪🚀🦄

Kleiner Perkins @kleinerperkins

This year we celebrate 50 years of partnering with incredible founders who’ve made history. Today, we're excited to announce $1.8B in two new funds, KP 20 and KP Select II, to start backing the next 50 years of founders who want to change the world. https://t.co/QauDlnpu9L

Universal Basic Income for DAOs, anyone? Yep. It’s called Proof of Humanity.

Li Jin @ljin18

Are there any DAOs experimenting with implementing Universal Basic Income or any other sort of redistributive projects?

Also, I remain passionate about women-led NFTs, the more turquoise the better.

Claire Díaz-Ortiz @Claire

Seeking: Women-led NFTs that are beautiful and obscure (ish)? Bonus if the color turquoise is on feature. 🙏🤔 Help!

Where were the US-based unicorn founders born? Immigrants, y’all!

Ilya Strebulaev @IlyaStrebulaev

Where Were Unicorn Founders Born? New result on immigrants & US economy For 1,078 founders of 500 US unicorns, I identified founders' countries of birth. Conclusion: Over four out of ten unicorn founders are first gen immigrants. @StanfordGSB #startups #immigration #unicorn

Hearts

COVID came during my birthday week so we couldn’t go out, but I am 100% headed here this week. SWOON.

Kanjun 🐙 @kanjun

It’s currently 2am, and I’m reading in a bookstore that’s also a bar. Why aren’t all cities like this?

Also, in case the introductory story was not crystal clear, on behalf of Little Tony I would pay lots of money to be able to find my old machine. Mr @ericbahn is one lucky man!

ericbahn.eth 💛 @ericbahn

When I was 6 years old I got a Nintendo for Christmas. I kept this device for 34 years, and today my 6 year old is playing it with me. Feels like magic!

Bye now,

Claire

Claire Diaz-Ortiz’s Newsletter

I did a bad thing, Tony.